"Living a LIFE with NO REGRETS.........."

This morning, I did a call on "regrets". Did you know that you may have some regrets, due to some choice that you have made? These hidden feelings, could be holding you back from moving forward.


A nurse wrote a book entitled: The Top Five Regrets of the Dying - A Life Transformed by the Dearly Departing. It is a memoir of her own life and how it was transformed through the regrets of the dying people she cared for.

My mentor shared this with me, it helped me to "get OVER the hump". I felt STUCK and didn't know why. I mean I was doing what I thought I should be doing, but at times I felt as if it wasn't enough. I could or should have done MORE!!! Here's a snippet of her book......


REGRETS OF THE DYING

For many years I worked in palliative care. My patients were those who had gone home to die. Some incredibly special times were shared. I was with them for the last three to twelve weeks of their lives.

People grow a lot when they are faced with their own mortality. I learnt never to underestimate someone's capacity for growth. Some changes were phenomenal. Each experienced a variety of emotions, as expected, denial, fear, anger, remorse, more denial and eventually acceptance. Every single patient found their peace before they departed though, every one of them.

When questioned about any regrets they had or anything they would do differently, common themes surfaced again and again. Here are the most common five:


1. I wish I'd had the courage to live a life true to myself, not the life others expected of me.

This was the most common regret of all. When people realize that their life is almost over and look back clearly on it, it is easy to see how many dreams have gone unfulfilled. Most people had not honored even a half of their dreams and had to die knowing that it was due to choices they had made, or not made.

It is very important to try and honor at least some of your dreams along the way. From the moment that you lose your health, it is too late. Health brings a freedom very few realize, until they no longer have it.


2. I wish I didn't work so hard.

This came from every male patient that I nursed. They missed their children's youth and their partner's companionship. Women also spoke of this regret. But as most were from an older generation, many of the female patients had not been breadwinners. All of the men I nursed deeply regretted spending so much of their lives on the treadmill of a work existence.

By simplifying your lifestyle and making conscious choices along the way, it is possible to not need the income that you think you do. And by creating more space in your life, you become happier and more open to new opportunities, ones more suited to your new lifestyle.


3. I wish I'd had the courage to express my feelings.

Many people suppressed their feelings in order to keep peace with others. As a result, they settled for a mediocre existence and never became who they were truly capable of becoming. Many developed illnesses relating to the bitterness and resentment they carried as a result.

We cannot control the reactions of others. However, although people may initially react when you change the way you are by speaking honestly, in the end it raises the relationship to a whole new and healthier level. Either that or it releases the unhealthy relationship from your life. Either way, you win.


4. I wish I had stayed in touch with my friends.

Often they would not truly realize the full benefits of old friends until their dying weeks and it was not always possible to track them down. Many had become so caught up in their own lives that they had let golden friendships slip by over the years. There were many deep regrets about not giving friendships the time and effort that they deserved. Everyone misses their friends when they are dying.

It is common for anyone in a busy lifestyle to let friendships slip. But when you are faced with your approaching death, the physical details of life fall away. People do want to get their financial affairs in order if possible. But it is not money or status that holds the true importance for them. They want to get things in order more for the benefit of those they love. Usually though, they are too ill and weary to ever manage this task. It is all comes down to love and relationships in the end. That is all that remains in the final weeks, love and relationships.


5. I wish that I had let myself be happier.

This is a surprisingly common one. Many did not realize until the end that happiness is a choice. They had stayed stuck in old patterns and habits. The so-called 'comfort' of familiarity overflowed into their emotions, as well as their physical lives. Fear of change had them pretending to others, and to their selves, that they were content. When deep within, they longed to laugh properly and have silliness in their life again.

When you are on your deathbed, what others think of you is a long way from your mind. How wonderful to be able to let go and smile again, long before you are dying.


I challenge you to think about where you are an where you want to go in life. Now think about things that you have done OR should have done, how do you feel about them? Do you have any regrets? If so, CHANGE YOUR MIND SET, STOP and REDIRECT!!!



I am decided that I AM "Living a LIFE with NO REGRETS.........."

Walking on WATER....

WOW, really God, me? I asked..."Why not YOU?!" He replied.

Well, this weekend I stepped out and WALKED on water. I have had an idea of what I wanted to do for a long time now. I mean, I have gone through thIs journey of soul searching and seeking for self evolvement. God "drove" me into the wilderness to prune, pruge and groom me for such a time as this. I have linked up with, dropped, kicked and pushed people in and out of my life during this entire process..........oh and speaking of "process" IT AINT AND WASN'T EASY!!! (that's a whole 'nother blog....)

So, I have a calling on my life, right? I mean I have a purpose for existing, we ALL do. Having it and "finding" it are totally seperate and have seperate journeys.

This weekend, I stepped out on water and I DIDN'T SINK and you know what, if I do, He'll reach down and save ME. Now, I will be WALKING on water every chance I get!!!!

My CONFESSIONS.......

Ok, I got a CONFESSION and I heard the "Confessions is good for the soul...." right? Anyway, when I started Passion Academy, 5 weeks worth of classes that was started by 2 wonderful, powerful, meek and beautiful women, I thought that I was ready for the next level. I mean I had all these dreams and visions. I was doing them or part of them......well, I started anyway....but I was doing more that MOST people, right? I mean, at least I was moving......

As I continue with this journey and as I look back on the GOOD stuff that the Academy taught me, things like K.I.M and buying a plant. Oh let's not forget writing your story and making your vision boards. All of these things that I KNEW I had in the bag. I KNEW that I could do them and move forward or upward, but then REALITY came in a smacked my in the face....HARD. I was NOT ready. I didn't have the confidence to act on what was being taught and move forward. I didn't know what my next move should be or how to pursue it.

In additional to THAT I was mimicking other people, WTH, I mean how messed up is that! I would hear and listen to other peoples story or read a REALLY good articles about how someone else over came their challenge or pursued their dreams and I would mimic them and try to do things exactly like they did. They did it, they had positive results, they, they, THEY! What about me, me, ME.......well the realty is, I STILL HAD ISSUES, UGH. I had issues with myself, my past, my relationship, my present. Did I do the 1st assignment right? I looked in the mirror, I wrote the list. Did I miss something? Nope, I didn't. The fact of the matter was, I was NOT where I thought I was and I was NOT as ready as I thought I was.......

Since then, I have walk out on faith and pursued the birthing of a platform, which was formed out of my pain and journey, "Conversations from the Heart". I have a couple of faithful people that encourage me, push me pray for me and hold me accountable to the tasks that God sets before me. I have some GREAT mentors that set me up and PUSH me out, even when I am nervous and not confident in myself, because they believe in the power that lies inside of me, WHAT A BLESSING! :-) Even though I still deal with certain issues and set-backs, God STILL loves me enough to send me some help and assistance, WOW.

These days, as I dig DEEP, I am finding out more and more about myself. I am learning to be totally honest and real with me, 1st. Being transparent with yourself is not an easy task, but I am grateful for the strength and endurance that has been birth in me.

My testimony is I am no longer afraid of being honest with myself. For years, I have been making excuses and justifying reasons for why I was the way that I was. When the reality is, I just was NOT ready or I was just plain out of order! I thank God today for strength, for in my weakness, HE is made strong!!!

Hold on......a change WILL come....

On my way to work one morning, I read an article about Robin Thicke. In the article he talked about finding himself through his music, his 3rd album is due to be released late September. He talkes about his career path and how his frame of mind went from sadness, loneliness and depression to new songs of change and hope. This was to be an album of the celebration that he's going through and the healing that he wanted to give to the people that listen to his music.

He commented that the 2nd album was about a guy who'd been stripped of everything, no money, about to lose his house and his wife is off becoming a movie star and how everyone else is pretty much leaving him (sounds familiar?) All the cool friends stopped inviting him to parties and how he was all alone at home writing songs about what he was feeling. Ok, now the POINT of the blog…..

He talked about a lot, but what caught my attention was his answer to this question: Did you consider quitting music altogether?

His answer: No, because music is my life. I had thoughts about quitting life altogether. I didn't have a knife on my arm, but emotionally, I thought "God, what am I here for? You tell me that I'm supposed to make music. I feel this and know I'm supposed to, but YOU won't give it to me…."

That statement became SOOO real for me! I have just gotten through the same trying time. I was crying out to God trying to make sense of it all. I mean, I did everything that He had instructed me to do, I relocated to the East Coast, cut ties to folk that I thought would be in my life forever, came to terms with some stuff that even I was embarrassed about and even shared my personal space with my 17 year old sister, who by the way had challenges of her own!

I did all of that, but still had questions. Still wanted to know WHY??

Have you ever been there, if not, live a little longer or get real with yourself and you will.

Well, I'm better these days. I woke up one day and heard it break, there was just a pop in the spirit and I was renewed and full of vigor. I can't tell you how long this will last, but I can tell you, like my friend Robin Thicke, having been knocked down and pushed to the ground, it has made me appreciate life, my friends and loved ones and GOD!

I have a deeper praise and worship that goes beyond being seen or heard in a church.

My love and devotion to HIM is now really personal and everlasting!!!!

Unstoppable Forces and Immoveable Objects

Ok….this is the 1st time that I have ever blogged……here goes it……

I saw The Dark Night this weekend and thought it was a great movie! The acting and the action was awesome, however there was a line in the movie that had me searching the floor for my purse to write it down so that I won't forget to do some research later.

For those of you that have seen the movie this should refresh your memory, for those you that have not yet seen it, read closely……

"I don't want to kill you. What would I do without you? You complete me….You just couldn't let me go, could you? I guess that is what happens when an unstoppable force meets an immoveable object. You are truly incorruptible, aren't you? You won't kill me out of some misplaced sense of righteousness……and I won't kill you because you're too damn fun!
We're going to do this forever"
-The Joker to Batman, The Dark Knight

Ok , I did some research and according to logic, it is impossible to have these two entities in the same universe, but what about the spirit realm?!
If we take a look at this for a spiritual perspective, this is what happens when the anointing of God meets our flesh (mind). There is what I will call a standoff. God is trying to do something to reveal something to us and we challenge him. He is the "force" and we're the "object". Force is defined as strength; energy; power; intensity and object is defined as to refuse or attempt to refuse to permit some action.

Take a spiritual evaluation and see if you have an "unstoppable force meeting the unmovable object in your life" and pray that God will give you the power, strength and knowledge to handle it…….