On my way to work one morning, I read an article about Robin Thicke. In the article he talked about finding himself through his music, his 3rd album is due to be released late September. He talkes about his career path and how his frame of mind went from sadness, loneliness and depression to new songs of change and hope. This was to be an album of the celebration that he's going through and the healing that he wanted to give to the people that listen to his music.
He commented that the 2nd album was about a guy who'd been stripped of everything, no money, about to lose his house and his wife is off becoming a movie star and how everyone else is pretty much leaving him (sounds familiar?) All the cool friends stopped inviting him to parties and how he was all alone at home writing songs about what he was feeling. Ok, now the POINT of the blog…..
He talked about a lot, but what caught my attention was his answer to this question: Did you consider quitting music altogether?
His answer: No, because music is my life. I had thoughts about quitting life altogether. I didn't have a knife on my arm, but emotionally, I thought "God, what am I here for? You tell me that I'm supposed to make music. I feel this and know I'm supposed to, but YOU won't give it to me…."
That statement became SOOO real for me! I have just gotten through the same trying time. I was crying out to God trying to make sense of it all. I mean, I did everything that He had instructed me to do, I relocated to the East Coast, cut ties to folk that I thought would be in my life forever, came to terms with some stuff that even I was embarrassed about and even shared my personal space with my 17 year old sister, who by the way had challenges of her own!
I did all of that, but still had questions. Still wanted to know WHY??
Have you ever been there, if not, live a little longer or get real with yourself and you will.
Well, I'm better these days. I woke up one day and heard it break, there was just a pop in the spirit and I was renewed and full of vigor. I can't tell you how long this will last, but I can tell you, like my friend Robin Thicke, having been knocked down and pushed to the ground, it has made me appreciate life, my friends and loved ones and GOD!
I have a deeper praise and worship that goes beyond being seen or heard in a church.
My love and devotion to HIM is now really personal and everlasting!!!!
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